One major component of my coaching program revolves around “finding true love through your authenticity”
The reason being is so many men waste time, money and energy dating women while putting on a facade of who they really are.
When you hide who you really are, it doesn’t matter if the woman calls you out on it or not; you are deceiving yourself.
Do you truly expect to find your soul mate by not accepting and embracing who you are authentically, genuinely, honestly, or wholeheartedly?
Below are scenarios where men hide their true selves in the dating world by not being upfront about who they really are. In the end, the only person they are hurting is themselves, their money, their energy and their time.
Your Age:
Ok, if you are 35 but wrote you are 28 on your dating profile, you are deceiving yourself. The difference is you would be dating much younger women and oftentimes that may not be the best thing. Many men came to me and complained that they broke up with women who were more than 10 years younger because of incompatibility. People at different stages in life want different things in life. Women in their 20s may want to attend parties or go out more with their friends. If you are 35 years old wanting to settle down and start a family, she may not be ready for that. Many men find out the hard way that it can be difficult to be intellectually compatible with a much younger woman. By not being honest about your own age, you would continue to date much younger women and be in the wrong dating pool. And trust me, women would not appreciate if you are 35 but said you are 28, when they made it clear in their dating profile they want to date men younger than 30.
Your height:
If you are 5’8”, please don’t put you are 6’2”! Women are not stupid! When you meet the woman on the first date, she would notice instantly you aren’t as tall as you claimed. Has it ever occurred to you that she may be 5’8” herself?? And if she wears high heels, she may tower over you (doesn’t matter if she minds that or not). If she prefers taller men where she would feel safer and more protected, you would be wasting your time because she would eventually stop dating you. Being honest about who/what you are is the first step to finding true love.
Your relationship status:
Many of the women I know have had experiences dating men who were seemingly “single” or “divorced” but after a few dates, when things seemed to be going well between them, that he confessed that he is “separated” but not fully divorced from his wife.
You are not only hurting the woman you are dating by omitting such an important piece of information, until after she’s developed strong feelings toward you, you are also taking a risk of breaking your own heart should she decide to break up with you for being dishonest about your relationship status.
The key here is when you are being honest about your status, she is fully aware of all the uncertainties of dating someone who is not fully single/divorced. She knows she may potentially be your rebound, or you may reconcile with your wife. At least she is aware of all the risks involved if she chooses to continue dating you, because you were honest and upfront about your relationship status.
Do you wish someone you date to be dishonest about who she really is? Let’s not treat others the way we don’t want to be treated ourselves.
You have children or your custody arrangement:
When you have children or have full custody or 50/50 custody, you should state that on your dating profile. You should disclose this on your first date with the woman.
Having children in itself, is a very big commitment, and being a parent takes time and energy to be committed to your child/children. So being up front about it is the best way to go. Women would appreciate you for disclosing the truth early on so she may make the right decision to want to invest in this relationship or not.
Sharing your life vulnerably is the key to finding the right woman who can embrace you and those you love in your life.
Does your dating profile reflect your true self and the dating conditions you have in your life? Or if you meet women organically, do you volunteer these important information about your life?
～ Love you more ❤️
Kolline