She hurt me!
She hurt me!
I have been there..
In his shoes..
My client, Mark, age 48
Recently..
In one of the exercises-
We did..
Started to remember..
All the details..
Of the most traumatic event..
Of his life..
“She hurt me,” he cried.
“How did she hurt you?”
I asked..
Seeking to understand..
That incident..
Where they got into an argument..
And..
That WASN’T the first time..
Where his anger proned, alcoholic ex girlfriend..
Would grab stuff and throw at him!
Like a little girl..
Throwing a temper tantrum..
But she’s a grown adult..
And would lose control in
Heated moments like this..
But this time-
She grabbed a beer bottle..
To throw at him..
The bottle..
Was broken on the way
Hitting the furniture next to him…
Then..
The shattered pieces of the glass-
Cut his arms, legs, etc.
He showed me a photo..
Of him in bloody cuts and
There were other bruises..
On his body..
As he said-
That was not the first time..
It happened 3 years ago..
That night, his 18 year old son witnessed the fight.
His son called the police..
For him..
And they placed a restraining order against her..
Mark never saw her again..
His son helped him make the arrangement..
For her to move out of his house..
This event traumatized him.
For the past 3 years..
He couldn’t talk about it..
He felt embarrassed..
As a man..
As a dad..
Especially to his son..
Who had to step in to help him…
Since then-
He experiences extreme PTSD..
He hasn’t gotten in any romantic relationships..
Even he’s met a few-
Nice compatible women..
Who found him attractive..
He’s anxiety prone..
He has panic attacks frequently..
He suffers from insomnia..
His self trust diminished since..
He can’t forgive himself..
He grieves over the relationship..
Then-
He blames himself.
He beats himself up.
He didn’t understand why when he truly loved her..
And it was still not enough..
To make it work..
Why did she hurt him?
Why wouldn’t she change?
Was he not worthy of love?
These were the questions he repeatedly asking himself-
In this vicious cycle of-
Not having a closure..
He’s now in the process of healing and reinventing himself..
Have you experienced what he experienced?
You are not alone.
Let’s chat.
~ Love you more 
Kolline